I wanted to share a handful of ways I’m able to stay happy and feel fulfilled while being a stay-at-home mom to four little ones. Adjusting to being a new mom is hard. You don’t interact with adults like you used to, you’re not required to wear nice clothes or even shower! Because being a mother is so demanding, it can be very easy to become overwhelmed and feel under-appreciated. While there isn’t any one thing that works for everyone, I’ve compiled my 5 ways to self-love. These are just a few things that have helped me. I hope this post inspires you to love yourself a little more. Remember that in order to help others, you need to be able to help yourself first.
Setting weekly goals + being organized
Setting weekly goals + being organized
One thing I’ve learned over the years is, if I want to have a successful week, I need to write down my goals and get my calendar organized. If I wake up in the morning and have a clear vision of what I want to accomplish for the day I’m able to focus on what needs to get done and be efficient with my time. Being a stay-at-home mom definitely has its challenges. There is so much that needs to get done that no one really notices… no one notices that you’ve spent hours on the laundry until it’s not folded and put away. No one notices you haven’t been grocery shopping until there’s no food. And because there are so many things you do everyday that go unnoticed, it can often times be a little discouraging.
The physical act of crossing something off my list of to-do’s or accomplishing a goal I’ve been working towards makes me feel so empowered! It adds value to my life and forces me to recognize all the hard work I’ve done (even when there’s not much to show for it). Being organized helps me stay focused and be efficient with my time.
Click through to continue reading the rest of this post!
Taking Time For You
Taking Time For You
Moms are notorious for taking care of everyone around them and neglecting themselves. I truly believe there needs to be a balance. Personally, I enjoy putting on makeup and doing my hair. I love trying new products, testing out face masks, and painting my nails. When I set aside a few extra minutes everyday to indulge in doing something I love, I find I’m much more pleasant to be around.
It might mean I took a five minute shower and braided my hair or it might mean I skipped the shower and painted my nails, but those few moments I spend on myself help me to refocus and enjoy my kids. It’s really challenging to run on empty, and you’ll be so surprised at how much it’ll change the mood in your home when your tank has been filled.
I’ve been using Biossance since the twins were born and it quickly found its way into my top favorite beauty products. You can read this post here to see all the ways I use it and how it saves me time as a mom. This past year, I’ve really noticed my skin starting to age. It’s been a little difficult to accept the fact that I’m no longer a young 20-year-old!
The past few months, I’ve been focusing on my skin care routine and one of the oils I’ve recently begun using is the Nourisher from Biossance. It’s an oil blended with an elixir of roses designed to keep the skin radiant, supple, and smooth. You only need a few drops, and because of the high Vitamin C content, I feel like it just rejuvenates my dull-looking skin and gives it a nice healthy glow. The Nourisher is a great product to put on after washing the face and, because it gives the skin such a soft texture, it’s a great way to prime your makeup! Whatever it is that you’re passionate about, find that balance and don’t feel guilty for spending time on you.
Biossance is running a self-love contest and giving away 50 deluxe samples (a $15 value) and 10 people will win their future line ($183 value). If you’re interested in entering, go follow @Biossance on their Instagram page, post how you’ve learned, or are still learning, to love yourself and tag Biossance!
Live and Love Intentionally
Live and Love Intentionally
When I live with purpose and love intentionally, I find I’m able to live a more meaningful and happy life. When I live with purpose, I make decisions that support my goals and when I see myself accomplishing what I’ve set out to do, I’m much more confident in myself and my abilities. One of the greatest resources for me in feeling empowered and confident is my husband.
We’ve been married nearly nine years and I believe the reason why we are just as in love today, if not more, than the day we got married is because we love intentionally. And don’t get me wrong, we still have our struggles just like every couple, but we’ve learned to work together and over the years, we’ve developed very similar goals. By understanding him and putting his needs before my own and vise versa, I’ve found great fulfillment and joy. It’s important for me to choose him every. single. day and those small choices I make in putting him as a priority has ultimately led to the happiness we find in each other and in our family.
Don’t neglect the people in your life who love you and want you to succeed, those are the relationships you need to foster and spend time on!
My top priority has been and always will be my children. This doesn’t mean I’ve always put them first because I’m constantly learning and trying to figure out that balance. Nut I’m most happy with myself when my actions sync up with my priorities. I want my kids to remember me playing with them. I want them to know that they are more valuable to me than anything else. And saying that they’re a priority and actually having them be a priority are two totally different things. I will often get lost in the laundry, cleaning, cooking and shuttling kids to school that a whole day will go by and I’ll realize I haven’t really enjoyed my children.
Don’t forget that they are your priority and you will find joy and fulfillment in your own life when your actions reflect that.
Living a Healthy Life
Living a Healthy Life
This one is the most challenging for me right now because it seems to take up the most time. And it’s all hard work! Carving out 45 minutes to exercise and planning/prepping our meals is definitely hard with four little kids. Keep in mind, we live thousands of miles from any family and have zero baby-sitter/home cleaning help. When we put the work in though, the payout is soooo worth it!
When Brian and I are eating healthy and we’re in shape, we feel so much better about ourselves. We are more inclined to take the kids out and be adventurous. It’s so easy to always choose a movie, or to let the kids play on the ipad. When I’m active and in shape, I make little choices that change the energy and mood in our family. Plus there’s nothing like fitting into those “goal” jeans, am I right?! Every Saturday, we plan out our meals and spend a couple hours prepping our food. Life changer. My friend Leanne has a great post about how she preps her food with some yummy recipes too! If you’re interested in a new post about how we do it, let me know in the comments!
I hope you enjoyed this post. Most of all, I hope it inspired you to love yourself just a little bit more. Spending time on yourself isn’t being selfish, in my opinion you’re able to give more love to those around you when you love yourself. What’s your self-love story? Do you have a few things you do every day that help you enjoy motherhood?
Shop this post: Sweater | Jeans | Frames above bed: Ikea | Desks: Ikea | Nightstands: Re-purposed Ikea | Lamps: Target | Quilt: Marshalls | Toy Baskets: Target | Vanity Mirror: Pottery Barn | Vanity Desk: Pottery Barn | Ghost Chair: Home Goods | White Office Chair: Amazon | Jute Rug: Overstock
This post was sponsored by Biossance but all opinions are my own and I only recommend products that I truly love. Also, I’m usually wearing leggings and a boyfriend-tee while hanging out. I thought I’d try to be presentable for this photo shoot though! MUAH
26 thoughts on “5 Ways to Self-Love”
Really nice post and I like what you had to say. The part about priorities and family etc really resonated with me…sometimes I feel guilty when I do focus on the housework over playing with my 20 month old…or if I’m on the computer doing something and she looks up at me and I’m focusing on the screen rather than on her. I feel so bad when that happens but I’m glad to know I’m not alone. I always feel better when I’ve played with her and she is happy and I don’t feel so guilty. Thanks for sharing. Roseann 🙂
Definitely do a food prep/meal planning post! Love those and love your blog, and snaps. Hugs!
You are seriously beautiful, inside and out. You are a huge inspiration to me and I love that you post meaningful things like this. Plus, your little family is adorable. Granted I’m not a mother yet, but I think everything you’ve mentioned here remains true for anyone trying to balance a lot of things in their life. I feel like so many people think they are being selfish if they spend any time on themselves, but it’s so so important to do so to keep from getting burnt out and losing motivation. And showing people how much you love them can make YOU so much happier. It’s really a win/win. You are so spot on with this post, and a great example of what a stay at home mom should be.
You are seriously so kind, thank you for such a sweet comment!! You give me too much credit but I am grateful!
Abby- I am so very glad you posted this, + God had me read it at just the right time! It was most definitely needed today. Thank you so much for this wonderful post! <3
Oh you’re so sweet, thank you. I love hearing that I’ve been able to inspire, so it means a lot!
It sounds like you are doing a great job being a mom! Thanks for the tips, we are thinking about having a little one soon and it’s super helpful because I worry I might not cope! Love your snapchats too 🙂 sending love from New Zealand, i still think it’s so cool that your husband used to live here!
Yes! I want to visit but it’s so expensive to get out there!! Thanks for reading!!
Thank you soooooo much for sharing this! My husband loves when I take extra time for myself (doing my hair, putting on makeup…other than just mascera. ha!) so allowing myself the extra 10-20 mins feels so much less selfish when I know that he appreciates it as well. A supportive husband has been my saving grace.
Thanks for always sharing your personal and home fashion finds! I love your style and appreciate you sharing your fashionista gifts with us…and also letting us in on the “every day” stuff via Snapchat 🙂 It’s my fav!
I would love a how to healthy meal prep….I have a 3 month old and work part time, healthy eating takes a back burning sometimes. I need it simple.
Kay 1. You are probably my favorite. So, let’s be friends.
2. What kind of calendar do you use to stay organized?
3. I think I’ve asked you a million times on snapchat about your healthy eating and working out. What are you doing to workout? and what are you eating?
Girl, you rock!
Healthy eating post to come soon! And you’re seriously so sweet! I just use a regular calendar, nothing fancy and then a notebook. So I write down any activities the kids have foro the week or when my blog posts are due and then in my notebook I just have to-do lists. I could be more organized truthfully but it works. I tried trello for a little while and I need to just write it down!
Meal planning/prepping post PLEASE!! I struggle with this more than you know… So much easier in the long run when you do it, but so overwhelming to start.
Abby, You are amazing, you are super momma and I look up to you more than you know babe!
Ugh it’s SO dang hard! You’ve just gotta get into a good rhythm and it’s so helpful when the husband helps 🙂
I feel like this post was for me! I have an almost 3 year old and a 2.5 week old. I live far away from my family and my cute hubby is in medical school. Getting back into a routine is tough and a goal in and of itself. Thanks for being a great role model! If you can do it so can I!!!!!
Oh yeah, girl you’ve gotta give yourself AT LEAST six weeks but seriously it took me six months after the twins were born to even feel normal again. Just be patient with yourself!!!
Hi! Great post. I do many of the same things. I also try to wake before my kids and get dressed (even if just in legging!) and put my make up on. I find even if I don’t go anywhere that day the whole day is more productive if I am up and ready. I do meal prep too and I also schedule in my calendar 2-3 exercise classes I really enjoy as my time. I also like to get my kids involved in the house cleaning with music and timers and of course rewards! I would be interested in how you meal prep. Take care!
Such a sweet posts. I loved these reminders, Abby. You are such a wonderful person. So happy I know you.
I absolutely loved this post! I am a stay at home mom too and this really is such a wonderful reminder. I honestly think you are super women to have four kids and do all that you do! I have a 2 year old and one on the way and I am not sure how I am going to handle that ha!
Simply Rachel Nicole
Love this article! It’s always nice to have a little reminder, the hustle and bustle in life leaves our priorities a little out of whack sometimes!
my baby’s name is abby… I’ve been following you in IG for a little bit and actually just came to this blog today… your article was really inspiring… I’m having a really rough time with my post partum… my son is 2.5 and my daughter 7mths… how do you do it? did you get PPD with any of your children? I would love some advice if you have… I’d love to hear from you when you get the chance to email me back
thanks again, mandy
Hi Mandy! I’m so sorry to hear you’re going through that. I know a lot of moms who have struggled severely with it and you just gotta get through it the best you can. I’m very lucky and have never had postpartum. I’ve gotten the blues and when combined with the exhaustion I’ve been pretty down but it’s not been anything serious. I wish I could offer you some advice! I do know that it’ll get better though, don’t neglect getting help if you need it and it’s absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.
Love following along your sweet family! You crack me up on snapchat… Seriously! Anywho I’d love to hear more about your workout/eating plan is looking like
Thanks!! And noted, I’ll try to get something together in the next little bit!
I just read every word of this post Abby. You are amazing! I was so surprised to see my name pop in there 😉 I’m so glad I have a friend like you to inspire me to be better. Love you! (Ps- when was the last time I commented on a blog?? Haha! It just means you’re REAL worth it!)
Oh Leanne, I just love you! And that post was worth mentioning!! And seriously, what’s even a blog? haha!